Thursday, November 03, 2005

Ghetto Bootie

I, thanks to my Latin roots, not only am blessed with the PDC's but also a thing we like to call Ghetto Bootie. Which is fine, I love my plump cheeks. What I don't love, is shopping for pants.
You see, they don't sell pants in my neighborhood for girls with GB. They sell them to fit anorexic crack whores. (East San Diego County has one of the nation's highest rate of crystal meth use) IF I can find a pair of jeans that fit my ass and thighs, the waist is so huge on me that I have to cinch it with a belt. That's a good look.
So my friend told me about Apple Bottom Jeans by Nellie. She said they have extra trunk for my junk and that the models have to have at least a 36" hip measurement. I looked them up and although they are out of my usual price range, the pay attention to a womans MEASUREMENTS not some made up inconsistant size.
AND they're having a model search! Oh my goodness, it's my chance to me a model! Oh wait. While it's open to anyone regardless of race, religion, and all that, I'm too old. they are only accepting applicants between 21 ans 27. At 28, I'm past my prime. That. is. so. sad.

6 comments:

jootastic said...

agh... i was so there with you... damnit... i'm sad for you. :)

Sensei Ern said...

Go for it. tell them you are 27 and a few months.

NWJR said...

You see, they don't sell pants in my neighborhood for girls with GB. They sell them to fit anorexic crack whores.

OMG, that cracks me up.

I'm a big fan of the GB, btw. Not all guys like stick figures.

Ginamonster said...

NWJR: Thank goodness for those of you who don't!

Sensai: Have you not learned yet about me that I cannot lie? Or at least unless it's to save my ass. Modeling does not fall into this catagory

Joolie:sigh. My moment will come.

Random Vixen said...

Didn't you see the first apple bottom model? she was on mtv. Seriously I have to admit i didn't buy a pair but I put them on and losing that huge back gap because youe ass is lareger then your waist was the best reason to figure out when i can afford a pair.

Ginamonster said...

That's what I hear. as soon as I find a store that sells them, I can't wait to try them. I will likely buy them!