Monday, November 07, 2005

Dear mike and cate and now julie,

thanks to you, I have caught the Haiku bug (until recently, I had not thought of haikus since 5th grade.) and I spent way too much time coming up with this one:

Girl Roomie Boy Friend,
Don't leave your pubes all around.
I find them. It's gross.


Sensei Ern said...

Ugh, Haikus. I despise poetry in general.

Ever eat so much of something that you never want to eat it again? That is how poetry is for me.

Back in high school, my regular English teacher was out on maternity leave, then spent several weeks on vacation. The substitute misunderstood her intructions for the class.

The regular teacher wanted 9 days of poetry lessons.

Instead, the sub made us suffer through 9 WEEKS of nothing but poetry. (This is when I began to consider the merits of home schooling.)

We were required to keep a journal and to write poetry in them each day.

The first two weeks were ok, thinking, "This has to end some time." Little did I know.

By week three, we were doing haikus. By week three, I had discussed everything that a 15 year old has ever thought about. I began to make up stuff just to fill the pages.

By week 5, I began writing poetry about how much I hate poetry. I wrote how it makes me want to vomit. I wrote how poetry class is like a prison.

During week 9, we had no idea our regular teacher was about to return. I dedicated the entire week to writing different forms of poetry on how I can kill and torture the teacher for putting us through this ironman poetry competition.

I remember the haiku I wrote:
Knives are not enough
Deserving a painful death
Poetry teacher

I got an "A" for the class because of that poem. The teacher said I had really blossomed. A redneck guy does not "blossom".

Should I ever be captured by terrorists, I can handle anything...I've been through poetry class.

hakgyv: Projectile vomitting induced by flashbacks of the suffering of poetry class.

NWJR said...

I regularly visit a weblog (Mr. Felix, see the link on my site) and leave him anonymous Haiku comments.

Maybe I'll start doing that here...