Chris, the fellow at my other work who I have a minor crush on and who once declared me an elf prompting me to go out and buy green shoes sent me an email just now. It said:
"Are you guys heading to lunch soon?"
to which I replied:
"Would that be me and my other personalities? Or do I have a conjoined twin stuck somewhere I can't see?"
No wonder I can't score a date outside of the internet.