Friday, August 05, 2005


My counselor says I don't need her anymore right now. I can call her if I have any more "bumps" to get over, but right now, apparently, I am cured. And all I had to do is decide that I am willing to consider the idea of having children.

However, the counseling sessions helped me in many other ways too. I now know that it is ok for me to be mad at my mother's second husband because he's a jerk. We get along now, but he really did make my childhood unpleasant. It's also ok for me to be mad at my mom for expecting so much of me. I can forgive myself for mistreating my siblings because I was really too young to take on the responsibilities that were put upon me.

What does this mean for my future? I don't know.

Scary dream though, I had a baby. A boy. There was no father. I think it's because I was watching "Where the Heart Is" before bed. I haven't finished it yet.

I also watched "Wake Up Ron Burgandy" last night. Lame. Don't bother. they constructed it out of delelted scenes, and it was obvious. The funniest parts had already been put into the uncut version of "Anchorman"


Sargini said...

Congrats Sweetheart. I knew you did not have any problem. Just a little hurt and unsure of your feelings. I wish My wife and I can meet you one day. And the Suanchanater.

Ginamonster said...

you never know, I may just come out to FL sometime!

Sargini said...

I'm sure you will. Don't forget to let me know.
We were in cali back in june of 2000. Yes there was still snow when we drove to lake Tahoe.