Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Vegas Notations

One thing I noticed while I was in Las Vegas is that I am skinny. In the swimming pool. Seriously. Normally, in my bathing suit, I look something like this:

Only I'm pretty sure I have hands and I hope my crotch isn't square. My head really is that small though. So, yeah. I look like a normal middle aged woman with giant thighs. and one razor sharp tibia. I stand like that too. Really. I've been working on standing with my feet parallel because I think it will take pressure off my knees.

ANYHOW, I noticed that when I was in the pool, all of the sudden, my fat was evenly distributed. I felt firm and skinny and normal and not at all buoyant. I'm a sinker. bloop. right down too the bottom unless I maintain a whole lot of air in my lungs.

So now that I have returned from Vegas, I am going to build myself a water tank and live in it. So I can be skinny all the time. And you know, all that treading of water might just make that dream come true.

Or I could stop drinking booze. But I think the water tank is a much better idea.

I am orange because I am tan. notice that I magically don't lose any boobage. That's some talent right there.


OsShirt said...

I'd be a little concerned. It appears that your crotch is, in fact, square in both pictures. And that can't be good.

Ginamonster said...