Weekend Update

It was quite a party weekend with surprisingly little drama. It was my friend Carolyn's 30th birthday bash, and we got drunk on Friday night, played games and watched movies Saturday night, and painted ceramics on Sunday night. Those of us who were left. I came and went. I had intended to stay all weekend as if I were out of town, but since I was not out of town, my life beckoned, and I mostly answered. I didn't tend to the homefires as I should of, but I had a great time. things i learned?

Some women are not afraid to handle each other's dildos. I didn't touch it, but here is the look on my face...



I have a bubble butt. I know I joke about my ghetto bootie, but I didn't know how serious it was until I saw pictures. I don't think you need to see the picture. but trust me. It's big, and round. Baloon-like, even.

If you believe in the "Orb" phenomenon in pictures, there were plenty captured. Only in certain areas of the house we were at, only at certain times at the party, and only around certain people. It's facinating to me, so here is a picture.



In the photo above, I am playing a game called Guesstures. Here are a few qotes from the game, which is like charades, only timed. Although there is a picture, I will not post the part where I tore off my shirt in an effort to demonstrate "Cast Off". Don't worry, I was wearing a bra.

"I'm Drunk"
"I had to find who was wearing underwear!" (after three attempts, I was the one wearing underwear)
"Way to stick that finger up your nostril!"
"Lick, Lick" "Nice"
"Cones honey, you got cones!"
"I want Nachos. My face is numb"

I was going to give you the fart quote, the one where we describe what it smelld like, but I have my limits.

Carolyn fell and hurt her knee yesterday while pretending to strip the the window at the Chinese Buffet. Today, I misunderstood her question, and was celebrating a Charger Victory at the mall, when she hit me with her cane. She was way too quick to lash out with that cane. A natrual. I was very disapointed to discover that she hadn't asked the mall patron if the Chargers won, but if they lost. When I learned the truth, I gave a more appropriate response.(FUCK!) It was nice seeing my city get all excited. I really had hope for the team. I will be sorry to see our coach lose his job, as is rumored.

Thus ends my weekend. I pray for an uneventful week.