Thursday, September 06, 2012

You called it, government

So, I'm filling out this census thing that asks all sorts of questions that I don't feel like looking up the answers to and a few that I think are a little personal and I come across one that says,

Because of a physical, mental, or emotional condition, does this person have serious difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions?

And I had to laugh.

Meanwhile, I did something scary today. I sent a text to the last boy to see if I could retrieve a couple of things from his place. Because today was the first day that the idea of cleaning up that last bit of things seemed bearable. I haven't heard back. I'm trying not to dwell on the why. Trying not to make up reasons because I don't now, nor have I ever really known what was going on in his head. I'm really really trying to put all these bits of me together again and accept that a man who gave me up so easily wasn't as into me as I was into him.

And the voice in my head says, "What if that isn't true?"

So I retreat again and try not to keep being the girl who waits for a man who is never going to call.

This was supposed to be a funny post.