decidedly NOT gleeful

Have you ever wanted to talk about something but couldn't because you were told under confidence and even though the person you want to talk to knows nothing of the situation and you aren't using names, you realize that you STILL can't talk about it because something in your head tells you it's a BAD IDEA?

Yeah. Me too.

Rollin with the Bombers

I posted the following to a new blog at Derby Nation.com No, I am NOT quitting here, I just want to write there too. But this one was good, or at least better than anything I have spit out in awhile. So I thought I would share it with you too. And pictures of my ass.



Last weekend a group of my Sisters and I drove over the hill to San Francisco to skate on the Bay Bombers Banked track.
Since I had never skated on a banked track and we aspire to be able to set up Rollerbych's track and bout on it, I was especially excited to get there.
It was hard. Tiring. Frustrating when you fall and slide right down into the infield when you know that you should be able to pop right back up. But the instruction we received from Dave was invaluable and while the Bay Bombers' derby is a little different than ours, they were there for the same reason we all do it. The love of the skate, the sport, the show.
It was funny how Dave insisted that we introduce ourselves by our real name. He didn't seem to want to call us Crazy J Danger, Flash Crash, D Rail Her. He was surprised to learn my name isn't really Grace. And the quiet comments about our fishnets were amusing. The louder comments about wearing more clothes when our asses would squeal across the masonite made me smile. Modern Derby Girls are proud of every bruise, every speckled rink rash. I showed my boss pictures of my wounds from that day. Only for Derby would my supervisor know what kind of underwear I wear.
Watching them that night, I knew I don't really want to be the same kind f derby they are. I want my game to be unpredictable, I want to hit with everything I have.
And, I want to still be doing it in my 50's and 60's because if there is anything I learned on Saturday, it's that you are never too old for this sport. And the railing hurts.

Alone or with someone

I would really like to go to the fair. It's a small state fair, kinda crappy, but I love to look at the critters and the crafts. I like to look at the stuff people are selling and resist buying. I simply love the fair.

I consider it a social event, and although I tell myself I can go by myself, I know I won't spend as much time there if I am alone. I'll spend ten bucks to be there for 20 to 30 minutes, make the rounds, maybe twice (yes, it's that small) and take off. So I sent a message out to the roller girls.

Yesterday several people wanted to go. Today? I don't have quite that response. Wifey is busy with her boy and I consider that an excellent excuse. Patty has also made plans with her boy, although she said she would try to convince him to go. I think her boy is fun to tease so that would be a blast. Flash Crash is out of town.

That's all the response I got. And I am a little hurt by it. I can't help it. But I suppose this is the kind of relationship I have fostered; not close. I don't usually get close to people. A response would have been nice. Via text or email. I sent the invite out via both. This is more effort than I usually put out for company. I don't usually seek out company.

Perhaps I am more high maintenance than I thought.

Louie is busy umping tonight.

We shall see, we shall see.

Things are good. I had a nice weekend. Had a date Friday with the man who will finally be called, Louie. I can think of one person who will very likely be able to say why. I am being vague again. Another one tonight. Schedules being what they are, I don't know when we will see each other again but we are in near constant contact. Which is kinda nice, and kinda nerve wracking. You know, because I can be insecure like that.

I don't think I mentioned that I saw the Cowboy a couple of weeks ago. I had hoped I could handle it, but apparently I was wrong, so it's a good thing that it was in passing while driving.

I also got a message the other day that W is getting married. I am happy for them but even though I don't want to be with him, it still made me feel a little funny. I think it will always be that way. I wish them both happiness though. As always.

The parade yesterday was loads of fun. Hot, but fun.

That's all I've got.

Updates

Oil wrestling was fun although I can't get the oil out of my hair or the smell out of my nose. I hate baby oil. hated it before, now I hate it more.

Been seeing someone, who still doesn't have a name. He's nice. I'm not sure about him sometimes. Other times, I want to see what happens. Our schedules don't match, which makes for a rare visit. And I have a theory that we are both scared to make any sort of move due to a few other theories that I have. Don't you love it when I am vague?

All else is well. I'm still not unpacked.

Things to do in Reno

If you aren't busy tonight, The Reno Roller Girls are wrestling in Baby Oil at Knuckleheads on Vine at 8:00. Hopefully there will be pictures or video soon...