I was sitting in my living room the other night, watching Bones, of course, when I was overtaken by an odor. The front door and windows were closed.
Suddenly, my house smelled like pot.
I'm certain that at some point in the past, I have ranted about how much I dislike the drug and the smell of the drug and anything that has to do with the drug.
You can speak to me all day long of medicinal properties, and while I will admit there likely are many, I still don't like it. Yuo aren't going to change my mind. This is a lifelong hatred with many levels of reasoning behind it and quite frankly, I don't think I need to fix it, I'm fine with hating pot.
I went outside, and sure enough, there was an odor out there too, so it's very likely that the smell came in through the back door, which is actually close to the front of my house.
Which means that either someone was smoking pot close enough to my house that I could smell it at my front and back doors and along the path in between (without me hearing footsteps or alerting the dog) OR my ghost has a very unwelcome habit.
Monday, July 22, 2013
Saturday, July 20, 2013
They just don't get it
I have a friend who is frightened of clowns. I don't mean that she doesn't like them, or even that she hates them, I don't mean that she would rather not meet one in a dark alley.
I'm saying that the mere sight of a clown will cause possibly-pee-your-pants paralysis.
I would hate to see what would happen if she DID meet one in a dark alley, but suffice to say, she's extremely healthy and would probably survive the massive coronary. Probably.
In the 5 years that I have known her, I have tried my best to protect her from the clowns. They are everywhere. I have learned to scope out the garage sales before she gets out of the car so that I can tell her where not to look until I can turn pictures around or hide dolls. We don't go to the circus. No haunted house at Halloween (the year we worked at one, we knew where the clown was and she was mostly able to avoid it) Parades are a frightening ordeal. In fact, she put on the next parade application that we need to be as far away from clowns as possible because we were RIGHT BEHIND them last time and she almost had to leave.
I'm one of the few people who gets it.
Most people are assholes.
Here's the thing. It's one thing to know someone doesn't like something. It's a whole other thing to intentionally expose them to that thing. And when the thing in question is an outright phobia? It's downright cruel.
I've seen scary clown stickers left on her car windshield. The kind with brightly colored noses and long pointy teeth placed in a manner in which she cannot help but view it upon sitting down in her car. I've been there when people have sent text messages with clown photo attachments. They get posted to her facebook wall, emailed, you name it, people have made sure that she has exposure in every creative manner you can imagine.
Clearly they haven't seen her crouched in fear behind a pickup truck trying to avoid visual contact. Clearly they have not witnessed the reactions, the frozen fear, the sudden intake of breath.
Imagine people exposing you constantly and intentionally to the one thing that terrifies you most.
People don't get it. People can be assholes. I expect this sort of behavoir from children who have not yet learned that other people are people with thoughts and feelings too, but not out of adults. Especially adults who like you.
This is not a woman who offends easily. The things she jokes about would make a porn writer blush. She loves a good prank and can take a joke.
I don't think this is a laughing matter. As I pointed out to her last night:
Would you put a clausterphobic in a coffin?
I didn't think so.
I'm saying that the mere sight of a clown will cause possibly-pee-your-pants paralysis.
I would hate to see what would happen if she DID meet one in a dark alley, but suffice to say, she's extremely healthy and would probably survive the massive coronary. Probably.
In the 5 years that I have known her, I have tried my best to protect her from the clowns. They are everywhere. I have learned to scope out the garage sales before she gets out of the car so that I can tell her where not to look until I can turn pictures around or hide dolls. We don't go to the circus. No haunted house at Halloween (the year we worked at one, we knew where the clown was and she was mostly able to avoid it) Parades are a frightening ordeal. In fact, she put on the next parade application that we need to be as far away from clowns as possible because we were RIGHT BEHIND them last time and she almost had to leave.
I'm one of the few people who gets it.
Most people are assholes.
Here's the thing. It's one thing to know someone doesn't like something. It's a whole other thing to intentionally expose them to that thing. And when the thing in question is an outright phobia? It's downright cruel.
I've seen scary clown stickers left on her car windshield. The kind with brightly colored noses and long pointy teeth placed in a manner in which she cannot help but view it upon sitting down in her car. I've been there when people have sent text messages with clown photo attachments. They get posted to her facebook wall, emailed, you name it, people have made sure that she has exposure in every creative manner you can imagine.
Clearly they haven't seen her crouched in fear behind a pickup truck trying to avoid visual contact. Clearly they have not witnessed the reactions, the frozen fear, the sudden intake of breath.
Imagine people exposing you constantly and intentionally to the one thing that terrifies you most.
People don't get it. People can be assholes. I expect this sort of behavoir from children who have not yet learned that other people are people with thoughts and feelings too, but not out of adults. Especially adults who like you.
This is not a woman who offends easily. The things she jokes about would make a porn writer blush. She loves a good prank and can take a joke.
I don't think this is a laughing matter. As I pointed out to her last night:
Would you put a clausterphobic in a coffin?
I didn't think so.
Thursday, July 18, 2013
A few possibilites
Back to that whole ghostie thing. I have come to a few conclusions regarding the ghost in my house. These conclusions are formed based on a couple of different incidents.
In incident (1), there is a plastic grocery bag on my studio floor containing old sheets for repurposing, and a pair of antique rosewood knitting needles, which I have not put away yet. The needles are sticking out of the top of the bag pointed to the right. One day, I run into said bag and say, out loud, that I really need to put that stuff away before I break those lovely needles that Lin was so kind as to give to me. I do love the rosewood needles.
A few days later, I notice that the bag is turned around to that the needles point to the left and cannot poke me again.
In incident (2), it should be noted that not long after I moved in, I found the letters "x" and "y" in my linen closet. The letters are made of foam and stick to the bathtub tiles. The previous owners of my house had a little boy who, it seems, is not playing with a complete alphabet. After finding the letters, I stuck them to my bathroom wall where they have stayed for the last 3 1/2 years, falling down on occasion, but generally they stick for a couple of months.
Until after the roommate moved out. Now they stick for a day or two, I pick them up, stick them to the wall, and continue with my shower. I'm thinking that it's been really dry lately.
Last night I got in the shower and noticed that the letters were not on the wall, not in the tub, but stacked neatly on the shelf where I keep my shampoo.
in conclusion:
I'll let you decide.
In incident (1), there is a plastic grocery bag on my studio floor containing old sheets for repurposing, and a pair of antique rosewood knitting needles, which I have not put away yet. The needles are sticking out of the top of the bag pointed to the right. One day, I run into said bag and say, out loud, that I really need to put that stuff away before I break those lovely needles that Lin was so kind as to give to me. I do love the rosewood needles.
A few days later, I notice that the bag is turned around to that the needles point to the left and cannot poke me again.
In incident (2), it should be noted that not long after I moved in, I found the letters "x" and "y" in my linen closet. The letters are made of foam and stick to the bathtub tiles. The previous owners of my house had a little boy who, it seems, is not playing with a complete alphabet. After finding the letters, I stuck them to my bathroom wall where they have stayed for the last 3 1/2 years, falling down on occasion, but generally they stick for a couple of months.
Until after the roommate moved out. Now they stick for a day or two, I pick them up, stick them to the wall, and continue with my shower. I'm thinking that it's been really dry lately.
Last night I got in the shower and noticed that the letters were not on the wall, not in the tub, but stacked neatly on the shelf where I keep my shampoo.
in conclusion:
- Someone is sneaking into my house, frightening my roommate, then keeping things tidy after he left. OR
- I am keeping things tidy and then forgetting that I did those things so completely that I have no idea I even did them. In which case, why didn't I walk 3 feet to put the knitting needles away? And why didn't I stick the letters to the wall like I have been doing for so long? OR
- I have a very considerate ghost.
I'll let you decide.
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Dear Lady on the Freeway behind me this morning
Hi. It's the Soapgirl in front of you. Please note a couple of things before I begin.
First, the sticker on my back windshield will likely give you the impression that I am involved with The Reno Roller Girls. This is true. It means that I like to skate. And I like to skate fast. So I'm not really going slow to piss you off.
Second, I drive a12 13 year old 4 banger. This means that although I like to skate fast, and I also like to DRIVE fast, sometimes it takes my little jalopy a bit of time to get there. Especially when there is a slight incline. yes. Slight. My Honey has never liked hills, even when she was a new jalopy.
As we moved out of the traffic at what is known around here as the Spaghetti Bowl where, not far from the interchange there were at least two accidents, I noticed that you were riding my butt. Wow. You were close. My speedometer said just less than 65, but I was working on accellerating. I would have accellerated sooner, but, there was traffice stopped on the freeway which means I proceeded with caution. And boy, you were riding my butt. I didn't move over.
I wanted to move over to get out of your way, but you see, I learned in High School Physics that matter cannot occupy the same place at the same time. I think that's Newton's first law of dumbass or something, which, I'm guessing you didn't learn because you were doing your best to meld with my car. I will be a little crass and tell you that my car doesn't like to take it in the rear.
As soon as I passed the semi truck on my right (putting plenty of distance between us so that I didn't cut him off), I put on my blinker, checked my review (oh my! you are even closer!), checked my sideviews, and then checked over my right shoulder because my darling car has lots and lots of marvelous blindspots and I want to live a very long time.
Then I started to move over so that you could go on your merry way. BUT WAIT! This was not fast enough because by the time I started moving over, you sped up and got over to the right and started to overtake me.
Thankfully I saw you and swerved back into my lane and also got to see you give me a dirty look as you passed me up. If I hadn't swerved suddenly to the left, your left front fender would have been hit by my right rear quarter panel resulting in a pretty ugly accident that we both would have been lucky to have survived given the velosity and the angle of impact which likely would have put me in a spin and given my high center of gravity, maybe a flip, which would have REALLY sucked because we were on an overpass.
Did we hypothetically live??
No we didn't. Because at freeway speeds, there is no way that semi truck would have avoided hitting our cars had we avoided going over the railing. On a two lane overpass, even if one of us was in each lane, someone would have been hit by that semi. And maybe, because those things are WAY more delicate than they show in the Cannonball movies, he might have jackknifed.
As you drove off, weaving through traffic, I hoped that wherever you were going was worth your life and possibly someone else's, because by the time you left me in the dust, I was going about 70 mph and you were passing everyone else, which puts you at 90 to 100 mph.
Just wanted to bring it to your attention that your extreme driving techniques nearly killed me and maybe you.
You're welcome for the physics lesson, asshole.
First, the sticker on my back windshield will likely give you the impression that I am involved with The Reno Roller Girls. This is true. It means that I like to skate. And I like to skate fast. So I'm not really going slow to piss you off.
Second, I drive a
As we moved out of the traffic at what is known around here as the Spaghetti Bowl where, not far from the interchange there were at least two accidents, I noticed that you were riding my butt. Wow. You were close. My speedometer said just less than 65, but I was working on accellerating. I would have accellerated sooner, but, there was traffice stopped on the freeway which means I proceeded with caution. And boy, you were riding my butt. I didn't move over.
I wanted to move over to get out of your way, but you see, I learned in High School Physics that matter cannot occupy the same place at the same time. I think that's Newton's first law of dumbass or something, which, I'm guessing you didn't learn because you were doing your best to meld with my car. I will be a little crass and tell you that my car doesn't like to take it in the rear.
As soon as I passed the semi truck on my right (putting plenty of distance between us so that I didn't cut him off), I put on my blinker, checked my review (oh my! you are even closer!), checked my sideviews, and then checked over my right shoulder because my darling car has lots and lots of marvelous blindspots and I want to live a very long time.
Then I started to move over so that you could go on your merry way. BUT WAIT! This was not fast enough because by the time I started moving over, you sped up and got over to the right and started to overtake me.
Thankfully I saw you and swerved back into my lane and also got to see you give me a dirty look as you passed me up. If I hadn't swerved suddenly to the left, your left front fender would have been hit by my right rear quarter panel resulting in a pretty ugly accident that we both would have been lucky to have survived given the velosity and the angle of impact which likely would have put me in a spin and given my high center of gravity, maybe a flip, which would have REALLY sucked because we were on an overpass.
Did we hypothetically live??
No we didn't. Because at freeway speeds, there is no way that semi truck would have avoided hitting our cars had we avoided going over the railing. On a two lane overpass, even if one of us was in each lane, someone would have been hit by that semi. And maybe, because those things are WAY more delicate than they show in the Cannonball movies, he might have jackknifed.
As you drove off, weaving through traffic, I hoped that wherever you were going was worth your life and possibly someone else's, because by the time you left me in the dust, I was going about 70 mph and you were passing everyone else, which puts you at 90 to 100 mph.
Just wanted to bring it to your attention that your extreme driving techniques nearly killed me and maybe you.
You're welcome for the physics lesson, asshole.
Monday, July 08, 2013
A long, long holiday
I did put on sunscreen, but the thing is, alpine sun and lowlander sun are very different. I can spend a week in Vegas in the sunshine and be fine. 2 hours on the shores of Lake Tahoe and I'm a little Tahoe Lobster. But not the edible kind. I need to work on that. It doesn't take much to get a sunburn around here. I don't want skin cancer. Or wrinkles.
Chango and I had fun though. He was a champ with the fireworks, crawling under my chair and being generally happy as long as I was touching him. If I didn't, he nudged my butt until I reached down to let him know he was safe. He enjoyed lots of attention and a quick run on the beach, and I discovered that he's a total kid magnet. And a shade hog.
We went home fairly early, so I had plenty of time to go hang out with HM on the 4th. From my house, even though I am only a mile from the fireworks, you can't see them because there is a tree in the way. From his upstairs window, we had a clear view. So we listened to patriotic music and then some Dropkick Murphys when that failed, and learned that we both like the kind of fireworks that are sparkly everywhere, although, I have to say, I've grown quite fond of the ones that look like Sideshow Bob's hair. Because they look like Sideshow Bob's hair.
It was a good holiday. A good weekend. Hope yours was good and safe as well.
Friday, July 05, 2013
Regarding Roomates
Although my friends and family heard plenty about what was happening with the great roommate experiment (part duex), I didn't talk about it here because I didn't want to bitch and complain and then have him find my blog, and get his feelings hurt over things he may or may not have been able to control.
What I learned was, I don't live well with others. At least not based on my last two roommate situations. When I think back, I did okay with most of my roommates over the years. If anything, I understand now that I was the asshole with my clutter and cats. But as far as situations go, the roommates were pretty good and I enjoyed having them around.
That was what? 10 years ago? 10 years (nearly) since Girl and Boy Roomie in the house with the goat. We had fun.
This time? I learned that I don't do well with other people in my space. Every little thing was an annoyance and when the roommate would do something really nice? I would feel kindly towards him for a couple of days until there was a drip of soap on the counter or something minor like that.
He moved out yesterday. Not because I kicked him out, and I don't think I was mean, but because he couldn't find work, so returned to Mississippi. Actually, he was in Eastern AZ last time I checked and is likely in New Mexico now.
I will miss the extra dollars. I did my best not to slip into old habits, but also spent more than I should have over the last couple of months. On the bright side, my car is running like fantastic and I paid for it with cash. I also got out of my new good habits so my refrigerator tends to be a little, well, bare. I think with focus I can get back to where I was.
I'm not planning to get another roommate. It's tempting, but why, when I was just irritated all the time?
I wish him the best and suspect I will send holiday cards and such. It's going to take a lot longer to pay off the credit cards than it would have with someone in the house, but I think I can live with that for the peace of having my house to myself.
I wonder too, what I will do someday if there is an offer cohabitation with someone I'm into. I suspect it will be a bit different. We forgive those we love things that we don't accept of others. I don't worry about that too much though. That sort of situation is not even on the radar.
What I learned was, I don't live well with others. At least not based on my last two roommate situations. When I think back, I did okay with most of my roommates over the years. If anything, I understand now that I was the asshole with my clutter and cats. But as far as situations go, the roommates were pretty good and I enjoyed having them around.
That was what? 10 years ago? 10 years (nearly) since Girl and Boy Roomie in the house with the goat. We had fun.
This time? I learned that I don't do well with other people in my space. Every little thing was an annoyance and when the roommate would do something really nice? I would feel kindly towards him for a couple of days until there was a drip of soap on the counter or something minor like that.
He moved out yesterday. Not because I kicked him out, and I don't think I was mean, but because he couldn't find work, so returned to Mississippi. Actually, he was in Eastern AZ last time I checked and is likely in New Mexico now.
I will miss the extra dollars. I did my best not to slip into old habits, but also spent more than I should have over the last couple of months. On the bright side, my car is running like fantastic and I paid for it with cash. I also got out of my new good habits so my refrigerator tends to be a little, well, bare. I think with focus I can get back to where I was.
I'm not planning to get another roommate. It's tempting, but why, when I was just irritated all the time?
I wish him the best and suspect I will send holiday cards and such. It's going to take a lot longer to pay off the credit cards than it would have with someone in the house, but I think I can live with that for the peace of having my house to myself.
I wonder too, what I will do someday if there is an offer cohabitation with someone I'm into. I suspect it will be a bit different. We forgive those we love things that we don't accept of others. I don't worry about that too much though. That sort of situation is not even on the radar.
Wednesday, July 03, 2013
I suck at the regular updates
Really the most of what has been going on is nothing too exciting. And Roomate. And seeing that guy I see sometimes more often so I shall refer to him as Handsome Man (HM) on the rare occasion that I mention him in passing.
BUT I did have to share this cube conversation with you...
B: MMM Raley's Pizza for dinner
Me: I think we are having Steamers (Steamers is a pizza place at King's Beach in Tahoe)
B: Cleveland Steamers?
Me: Eew. No.
and then the giggles began. because we're 12.
BUT I did have to share this cube conversation with you...
B: MMM Raley's Pizza for dinner
Me: I think we are having Steamers (Steamers is a pizza place at King's Beach in Tahoe)
B: Cleveland Steamers?
Me: Eew. No.
and then the giggles began. because we're 12.
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