This made me scream silently in horror. http://xtramsn.co.nz/news/0,,11965-5566182-300,00.html

I just realized that if you were to accidentally misspell blogger, you might end up with boogger. hee hee.

Today I am greatful for small miracles. When I put on my sweater, I saw what looked like a tag, but when I checked there was nothing there. then I felt something odd, so I reached up my shirt and pulled out my orange star spangled thong underwear. I had a giggle when I realized how hilariously embarassing that would have been if they had fallen out at work. I mean, if they were sexy and lacy, I might be able to score a date if they fell out of my shirt, but no, there's nothing sexy about the orange starry ones. Or at least I don't think so.

You know you have made it big when...

Your name makes it into the title of a comic collection.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0740749994/ucomicscom/002-0479542-7144808

For Madeline (Kahn. Not my old car)

"I'm so tired. Tired of being admired. Tired of love uninspired!"

Really, I'm just tired because I closed again last night. I know I should quit my bitching because I have learned that I am not the only one working more than one job. One woman I work with has 3 jobs and I think she goes to school too.

This is what we do in order to survive in America's Finest City. Only I live 20 miles away from Downtown in a town known for White Supremecy and it's Rodeo. T and I are having a good giggle over the fact that the Gay Rodeo will be held in my town this year. It's a place where it's not ok to be black, but they'll host a Gay Rodeo. Heh.

Next week, I'm on the schedule 8 hours. two shifts. One on Monday, one on Sunday, I close both. 8 hour work weeks are not going to pay off my credit card bill.

quiet today

haven't had much to say.

I'm loving seeing all the lilac in bloom. I had forgotten how lovely it is, I don't remember seeing any since the fires, which happened two and a half years ago. There is still alot of "damage" to the landscape, but the lilacs are back, and that makes me happy. One of the neat things I get to ponder every day is how you can have one flower in so many different colors. two bushes might be right next to each other with one blooming in a pale blueish purple, and the other, deeper and more vibrant. amazing.

My garden is looking great! I planted snapdragons and my strawberries are really going nuts with flowers and fruit. to think I had thought them dead! Jacks garden started to sprout, and my lavender plant is all over flowers. Hooray for me!

Ooh! a contest!

Zube put out a contest to design your superhero costume, so I thought I would share mine. I would like you to note that I did not extend the black trim into my crotch region because I thought it might look like pubes. Also, I am really impressed with my banana. um, banana peel.

Summin it up

We paid for our own, I tripped over a bench on the way over to eat, he spilled his drink into his food when we got there. we made casual conversation, didn't bring up baby mama, but discussed his sister. He walked me back to my double wide and suggested that we do something sometime. I said that would be a good idea.

I am apprehensive regarding the nervousness between us. It didn't go away like it should after you trip over a bench and both have a good laugh.

the end for today.

My "Nephew" Hamilton

This is Hamilton. A month ago he looked like this. Then he sprouted back legs. Hamilton provides hours of entertainment because he's really funny. You would have to see to understand. We don't know yet what kind of frog he will grow up to be.

This is Hamilton now. He sprouted his front arms the other day. Hooray for Hamilton! soon, he will not be a tadpole anymore. Sadly, Hamilton lives with my Sister in LA so I can only enjoy his development through pictures and stories. sigh.

ps. nervous about lunch.

What?Oh Crap!

I have a "lunch date" with HR.

I must have some major mojo going on because I got hit on last night by a 14 year old. I played along, I didn't have the heart to tell him I'm old enough to be his mother.

Bow to me

I have declared myself Empress. You shall all wear aprons.

And then I tried to rip my finger off by getting it caught in the outside door handle while I opened it and walked inside. it hurts all the way up my arm. apparently, I'm a rather clumsy Empress.

This one made me think of HR. There aren't any updates on that, but I agree with you guys, I don't know if I want to deal with the baggage. Time will tell. Thank you for your support and advice, as always.

Weekend update

Friday I had a meeting with my Marketing Director, and we agreed to try a conventional marketing approach for now instead of sales reps. I called C and asked how much he would charge to design my logo, and he said he wouldn't and that he was excited to do it, and flattered I would ask. For those of you that watch the OC, there was a band featured on last week's episode, and they flashed a picture of the album cover. It's C's artwork. Hooray for C! and also for Tally Hall, the band featured.

I placed my soap in my Friend Luis' floral shop, located in Ramona, California. It's called Teunis Floral. If you're ever in the area, go there, and buy lots of stuff.

I have decided to spend at least 30 minutes every day on Bubbly Creations stuff. I think it's time for me to be more devoted to my business.

Saturday night, on my way home from Harbucks, I missed my highway exit. Sigh. I will know soon, I hope, if having a second job is even worth it. I have to close both nights I work this week, which means I'm scheduled until 12:15, and I have to be back at work at 8 am. Last night I may have accidentally hurt someone's feelings. I hope she will forgive me. Sometimes, people don't take me right when they don't know me, and they don't know me there yet. Meanwhile, I will be more careful.

Last night a woman came into the store with a tiny dog tucked into her jacket. I would like to know why it is acceptable for her to bring in her tiny dog, but joe schmo can't bring in his rottweiler. Seems to me, dog hair is dog hair. I wanted to send her out of the store, but I have to be nice. She and her friends stayed a long time with that dog in the store. I think, that dogs should not be considered fashion accessories, and neither should they be brought into restraunts. (with the exceptio, of course, of helper dogs. this was a helpless dog. really.) It's an animal, not a necklace. I see them everywhere. Sure, they're cute, but imagine the looks of horror I would get if I carried my pet snake with me into restraunts and to the mall. (I no longer have a pet snake, I'm trying to make a point here) People would flip because they're "scary" but they don't shed hair and they don't make noise, and they rarely bite. funny how there is a double standard. I think the legislation should be upheld that dogs do not belong in indoor public areas, no matter how cute they are or how well they tuck into a purse, unless that area has been designated a pet friendly zone.

Multi Level Marketing

In the course of doing business over the last year or so, I have learned a lot of things. One is that just because you have a product, doesn't mean that people will buy it. That's where marketing comes in. Marketing is expensive.

My sister declared herself my Director of Marketing today. Hooray! (she's a go getter like me) I did not run this decision by my partner, she doesn't even ask how business is going. But I am happy that Shawna has joined my staff. I believe in her as much as she believes in me. And we both want to see Bubbly Creations succeed. Statistically, things look really good for Bubbly Creations, if you consider that I now have a Webmaster and a Director of Marketing. someday, I hope to be able to pay them! and me!

One of the orders of business for out phone conference this evening is the idea of how to better market my product. I will be seeing my friend who owns a floral shop tomorrow about placing my soap in his shop, but I agree with Shawna that we need more than that. And a way to stand out. My web site gets lots of hits, but not alot of sales.

We are considering whether to have sales reps, and I am researching accordingly. The following is what scares me about that possibility.

I have learned from previous experience that Multi Level Markeing is another way of saying, waste your money. I was reminded of this when I was approached by a Quixtar IBO last night. I couldn't afford to keep up with the demands of being a Quixtar IBO, or a Mary Kay Consultant, for that matter. I'm not saying bad things about either company, (well, maybe I'm a little negative towards Quixtar) but I don't like the idea of people trying so hard to make a living off of my product that they are willing to put themselves in debt.

I don't believe in Get Rich Quick, but I do believe in mutually benificial opportunities. No deceptive recruitment techniques. No expensive buisiness building materials.

So we will see how my Marketing Diretor and I are able to come up with a solution to take BC to the next level. This ought to be fun.

Clarifications

It appears that I did not properly convey my feelings regarding the HR situation. I recieved two very different comments from two men who's opinions I respect.

First, it was Mutual Friend who referred to her news as "exciting". Although, as I said, I am flattered that anyone would think so highly of me, I am apprehensive about taking this information seriously, and about the possibility of dating someone with as much baggage as he has, and with as high of an opinion of me as he apparently has. I left out a lot of details about that in my last post on the subject.

The reason I am not sure that I take this information to heart is that in 4 years of being aware of this man, we may have spoken 10 words between us. (I am being REALLY generous with this estimate. Really all I can ever remember saying to him was "Good morning, Richard") I have tried to find ways to be a part of conversation he is in, but he always leaves. I now know that he is just too nervous to speak to me, which is flattering, but does not bode well for future relations. I don't want to be with someone who is too shy to talk to me because I myself am shy and I feel very uncomfortable in situations where niether person will speak. Plus, how can he be himself around me if he doesn't think he is good enough for me? I want someone REAL. Someone on my level, not someone who has put me on a pedestal. Someone not afraid to wrestle.

One of the reasons I did not go rushing off to throw myself at him is that, as Sensei pointed out, he does have a girlfriend and a kid on the way. I accept the fact that he did not intend to be a father, and he certainly did not want to have kids with her. She took advantage of a difficult time for him, as she had moved in and gotten pregnant within a month of his mother passing away. I can already foresee mama drama from that one. especially if he and I were to start dating in a short amount of time after they break up (which, regardless of me, is eminant). I don't believe he is the type of person to run out on his kid, he will take care of it, just as he takes care of his disabled sister and, before she passed, his mother. He isn't the kind of man to turn his back on responsibility.

Which brings about another point. We all know about my struggle with the child issue. And I have been quite clear about not wanting to date someone with a kid (although E had a kid, but I never met him). However, this guy comes with strong enough recommendations that he might be worth it. Might. I would be taking on a kid and a sister with special needs. Am I mature enough to handle that? I don't know, and I will admit that I might not be.

Issue 3. T. enough said.

so I'm going to ride this one out. If he is as interested in me as he says he is, then he will approach me. I am not seeing anyone and haven't had a boyfriend in nearly a year. I think it's quite apparent that I am available. Goodness knows, I think I have made it quite clear as I have wandered through his office area wisecracking about this n that. Plus, if he wonders, there's my mother and mutual friend and other mutual friends to fill him in. I still maintain that I would like to get to know him. where it goes from there remains to be seen. BUT. I will not approach a man whom I know to have a girlfriend. I will treat him just as I always have, with politeness, same as any other man. I don't think he deserves special treatment just because he's attractive. I maintain that although I am attracted to him, he may turn out to be completely wrong for me. I will not let my fear of that get in the way of getting to know him, but I will say that it is difficult for me to be excited about his future availablity considering all the issues attached. If anything, I want to declare myself "not interested" because there are so many issues and preconceptions. I think it would be easier to date someone you just met than someone you have admired from afar for however many years.

Life. it's always interesting.

You know

You know I am tired when I come home from job #2 and try to use my car remote to open my front door.

It's only my first week. I hope I get into the swing of this.

Just like High School

So, mutual friend pulls me away from my facinating filing duties today to tell me something very exciting. I asked if I won the lottery, but she said no.

Apparently, Handsome Richard (the OTHER Handsome Richard, Rich) thinks I am just IT. But doesn't think he is of my caliber so he doesn't approach me. (My reply? I wander around tripping over my own feet and talking about farts, how can anyone not be of my caliber??)

Yes, he still has a girlfriend (they are breaking up) and yes, she is still pregnant.

What will I do about it? nothing. This is a man who leaves the room when I enter it because he is too shy to be around me. I am flattered and excited, but I have to refer back to my original feeling, "How am I supposed to get to know someone who won't talk to me?"

He asked mutual friend if he should approach me and suggested that perhaps he could do it at her wedding. (which she has told me about but not really invited me to. It'll be in Vegas. I love Vegas!) Her wedding is in August. It's April. yeah. He even asked if she thought I would bring a date. (um, based on current statisitics, the answer is no). Seems to me like August is really far away when you are as interested in someone as he professes to be with me.

In fact, when my ex comes on TV (yes, I have an ex who is sometimes on TV. I don't mention it very much because I say other stuff about that ex that is private) HR changes the channel. I think that's funny. But how would he react to my continued friendship with T, C, and D? Granted, if I had a boyfriend, the R rated conversations between T and I would end, but regardless, I still want his friendship, even though it is painful sometimes. But it would be less painful if I had someone else to ponder.

I don't know. I just thought I would share. Gotta go, Harbucks is calling and since I haven't eaten anything yet today (gobstoppers don't count) I need to make sure i have plenty of time to heat up a corn dog.

Hee hee

Searching for herbs in my area, I found a listing for the following:

Phat Dong

I'm going to hell.

Overalls

Spinning Girl (http://elevenpointfive.blogspot.com) brought back some memories today. The first was about fashion plates, which my sister, cousin, and I would play with for HOURS (no minutes) and since Shawna and I's set (really I think they were her's but I got to play with them too) and Lisa's sets were different, and some of the plates were interchangeable, we had way more than tens of outfits. or, at least it felt like we did. and, as with everything we did, Shawna's designs were always so much cooler than mine.

But that is not the big memory. The big memory is overalls. Now, I am too young to have worn overalls when they were"in", but I did get a hand me down pair from Lisa just after they went "out" (Lisa was bigger than me back then and I got her old clothes. She got her clothes from the rich girl downstairs, so you can imagine I was always WAY out of style) Since I didn't understand style, and even if I did, it wouldn't have mattered because I had all the "perfectly good" clothes from Lisa, I wore those overalls anyway.

Those overalls were a couple of sizes too big. Not because Lisa was that big, but because they just were. One day I realized that they were sizable enough to put both my arms down the sides at the same time.

Of course I showed Shawna and Dana my new trick. (Dana is the cousin that periodically lived with us. In my family, a cousin is like a sister that doesn't live with you. Except for when they do)

Of course one of them pushed me over. Then I was stuck. on the floor, arms locked inside my pants. Probably laughing, I don't know. But certainly unable to get up. I can't remember how I did it, but it must have been fun to watch. I sure think it's funny now. I don't think I put my arms down the sides of my pants anymore.

need.sleep.

because I slurped down a carmel macchiato at um, 9 pm last night and let me tell you, I went home, planted Jack's garden, played with Baby, cleaned my bathroom, comtemplated my kitchen (breifly) contimplated my soapmaking, showered, read, and then laid in bed. when I did sleep, I dreamed of work. when I woke up, I worried for a long time about what I might have done that was wrong, and how when I mopped up a latte mess, I didn't move the music display because it was too heavy and there was latte still under it.

I know I am neurotic, and a worrier. And I am really excited about this job because it's going to bail me out of financial discomfort, but dreaming about it goes too far. Then again, I would be really embarassed if I got fired from Harbucks. Well, I would be embarassed to get fired at my other job too. Really, mostly I don't want to get fired. which means I should, actually, go back to work.

Rest in peace bunny butt

Saturday I performed the difficult duty of taking my darling pet in to be put to sleep. By the time he went in, the eye you can see in this picture was red, puffy, runny, and full of pus. I would have liked to have been able to afford to continue with the medications and possible operations, the truth is, that I can't. because it was a choice between paying my bills and taking care of the rabbit.

I feel guilty about it even though I know I shouldn't. I remind myself that part of being a responsible pet owner is knowing that when an animal is suffering (and he was), sometimes it is better to let them go on to the summerland and be off to the next adventure. It is comforting to me that he is now in my vision of the summerland, in the middle of the big grassy field, running around my feet and nibbling my toes for attention. I doubt he will be there when I get there, since I would think that the soul turnaround time for a rabbit isn't very long (how long do you have to rest after the strains of being a caged bunny?) but I can still visit him in my head, and I like that.

Jack was a good bunny and a wonderful companion. Even when he munched carpet. I will remember him fondly and often. It's hard to look at the place where his cage was, but since I am making a planter out of it, I will be able to look at the flowers on my porch garden and think of him.

It will be a bloggeriffic day

Every Monday morning, I check in at www.postsecret.com to read the new secrets that have been posted. Sometimes, they speak to me, sometimes they break my heart. I found this one very interesting because the subject of this very thing came up in conversation this weekend.

A friend of mine told me that her brother in law has to get nakid in order to do his bathroom business. So does her son. It's a compulsive behavior that I had never heard of before, and I would love to know the psycological reason behind it. Unless the man above is my friend's brother in law, then it appears that this is something that may be more common than I thought. I think I will send her this picture so that she will know that her family is not alone.